Wednesday 10 December 2008

Real life intrusion

A colleague has just had a book published. Well, it's his in some extended sense; it's a sort of encyclopaedia of which he is the main editor, but he's making a tremendous fuss of telling the world about it and inviting them to the launch party. This poses a problem. No, not that one, I'm not consumed with envy; it's quite the opposite, I'm thrilled: the book's terrible. Long, long-winded, yet vacuous, it's supposed to be useful to anyone, professional or amateur, who wants to find out what's going on in the subject, either in general or in specifics. But it's so bad that I can't imagine anyone learning anything from it. So: what do I say to him that does not totally reveal my true opinion? The etiquette books are silent on this point. 

13 comments:

Ms Scarlet said...

Lie through your teeth. Do not drink at the launch because if you do so your true feelings, at some point, will come to the fore.
He's happy. It's Christmas. Why spoil it?
Has he not heard of Wikipedia?
Sx

xerxes said...

Lie? Of course. Like a rug. Doing it convincingly is the hard bit. But you are dead right over the non-drinking issue. Well spotted that girl.

Ms Scarlet said...

Have you been to the launch? What happened?
Sx

Flipping word veri is using my sign off: emayorsx

Kevin Musgrove said...

"It's a tremendous lot of work, congratulations!"

Thank God for the English language's copious scope for ambiguity.

xerxes said...

Kevin, very smooth. I shall note that in the handbook of non-autistic behaviour that I carry with me.

Scarlet, I bottled it (figuratively not liquidly). Yes, I know. Fee. Bull.

BEAST said...

Inky you just have to spout platitudes ie its incredible (ie incredibly bad) a masterpeace (Of dross) etc etc

Kate Lord Brown said...

'Congratulations. You must be very proud?' Easy to remember (even with the usual launch largesse). Comes in handy at weddings too. And christenings. Though not funerals (cf Curtis)

xerxes said...

Beast, Kate, very good. Yes, I've been to weddings like that (my brother's, and it was a disaster, she went off with his best friend after deciding he wasn't rich enough). But babies are different, even the ugliest has every chance of improving.

BEAST said...

Ma Beasty has a theory that ugly babies make beautiful children then revert to uglyness in adult hood , and likewise for beautiful babies .
I think she based this theory on her own offspring , I will not tell you which 'ugly' model I fit into , suffice to say at certain pionts in my developement I had what Pa Beasty described as a 'face like a dropped pie' :-(

Dr Maroon said...

No no no. I see I am too late. Next time, you say you found it 'fascinating'.


wv is; the ring. that's weird.

xerxes said...

Beast, you are a beautiful beast, we can all tell. Dr M, you are another smoothie. It must be that pure cane spirit.

Ms Scarlet said...

*cough*
Sx

xerxes said...

Ms S, am I neglecting you? What a brute I am, to be sure, begorrah. Would you like some of Dr M's Cape to Rio? Rocks? Mmm, smooth.