Last night I went swimming with whales. As one went by I squirted mustard in its ear. That made the whale thrash around a whole lot and I woke up at 4-30 in a Bristol hotel room.
Bastard whale, now I'm going to be useless at work today.
It could have been worse. You could have dreamed of swimming with a Welsh... (leaves feedline for gag involving Charlotte Church hanging invitingly in the air)
Christ Gyppo, that pun was awful, you should carry a warning light. Plus it's taken me till now to get it you swine.
Lulu I'm shocked, I'm a gentleman, I'd never squirt mustard in a mermaid's ear, I can't believe it's an erotic condiment. Do you mean that the Bristol waterfront is a little louche? Not next to Old Market, where I usually stay, an area riddled with the most blush-making establishments.
Whale, mustard, Bristol..... you're suffering from a well-documented and yet almost incurable syndrome, Inky. Only I can help you. Send £50 to the usual address to receive your first set of therapy instructions.
6 comments:
It could have been worse. You could have dreamed of swimming with a Welsh... (leaves feedline for gag involving Charlotte Church hanging invitingly in the air)
When you woke up to all that thrashing - was it a mermaid after all?
That's what happens when you choose a hotel so close to the water.
Christ Gyppo, that pun was awful, you should carry a warning light. Plus it's taken me till now to get it you swine.
Lulu I'm shocked, I'm a gentleman, I'd never squirt mustard in a mermaid's ear, I can't believe it's an erotic condiment. Do you mean that the Bristol waterfront is a little louche? Not next to Old Market, where I usually stay, an area riddled with the most blush-making establishments.
Whale, mustard, Bristol..... you're suffering from a well-documented and yet almost incurable syndrome, Inky. Only I can help you. Send £50 to the usual address to receive your first set of therapy instructions.
I'm predicting a bad case of the runs around 4:00 pm
Gadj, thank you! But don't cure me of mermaids. Oh, hang on, damn; i've left my wallet in my other trousers.
Nurse, at 4 pm I was sound asleep, during a presentation so beautifully narcoleptic that I recall nothing about it.
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